Career Advice

There’s no law in Canada that says you can’t. But if you do, beware the landmines. Pay’s right up there with politics, religion and race as minefield topics at work. People tiptoe around them ‘cause they’re laced with tripwires. Except your dying to know if Keisha (your rival) or Randall (the owner’s moronic nephew) are pulling down bigger bucks than you. Hacking into HR’s data is out of the question. And company policy forbids pay chats among workers.

Combine Writing And IT Know-How As A Technical Storyteller These multi-talents scribbles and yak about what techies produce, in language that rouses non-geeks. “Storyteller” used to be a synonym for full of @rap. Now it’s the buzzword in job ads for marketing communications. Apply this to the tech world for a niche IT career. Tech storytellers are part public relations guru, writer and public speaker, with an undercoat of nerd. A dope combo, much in demand.

Forgot to name numbers when describing results? Add them into razzle-dazzle recruiters. Lies. Damn Lies. And stats. Keep the first two the hell away from your resume: fibbing could get your ass thrown to the curb. Statistics, on the other hand – numbers, percentages, rankings – make recruiters drool. Quantifying deeds shines a spotlight on results. Employers love hiring achievers, especially proven ones. Metrics are the Holy Grail. Here are the top five ways to use ‘em.

Drone air traffic controller for delivery companies. Moon miner. New careers are coming sooner than you think. Your job may suck today, but there’s a whole new era of careers coming. Good thing, given how robots and AI will augment steal many current roles. Technology’s on a tear. Fighting work’s future’s like battling the Borg: resistance is (virtually) futile.

The option to opt out of work for a while, even if available, might come with a high price tag. Polls show 3 out of 4 Canadians are stressed. No shock there. Job uncertainty, money worries, health issues. They’re the biggest blood pressure raisers. Can make you want to chuck it all for a while. PGA golfers ain’t immune. Don’t let the lavish prize money fool you. With crushing expectations and public glare, even leaderboarders flee on a Tiger Woods time-out occasionally.

Marshalling your online following to foot your bills while transitioning is possible. But it’s probably not worth the effort. Hunting for a job when money’s tight is a pimp slap. It’s soul-wrenching enough to feel unmoored from your work identity. Add penny pinching and fear of going broke. Yeppers, job searching’s a hoot when wolves are at the door. How cool would it be to get financed on top of EI – without taking loans from granny, or from some skeeze at the pool hall? No vig to pay or debts to square. Use any bucks that trickle in to help defray living costs.

Seems like everyone wants to add “disrupter” to their resume. Measuring up’s no cakewalk. 77 million dollars over seven years. That’s the payday for John Tavares, Toronto Maple Leaf’s newest wonder boy. For a team that last won a Stanley Cup when Canada turned 100 (1967, over half a century ago!), disruption doesn’t come cheap. Your salary’s a pittance in comparison. Still, you fancy yourself a game changer too. Shaking things up. Stickhandling past dumbfounded defenders of “That’s not how we do things here.”

Pinpoint your competitive advantage, then power-drill it into the eyes of higher-ups. Your coworkers are smarter and harder working than you. Those who aren’t, sometimes go Machiavelli – backstabbing, sabotaging, swindling and kissing up. I’ve had to dive into that same swamp as an employee. I also found a legit way to make myself less disposable: find at least thing to contribute that leaves challengers begging for dregs.

Remember when Jimmy Kimmel’s "Mean Tweets" segment was an actual joke? Was it the muse for Twitter to unfold as the official platform for slander? The interpretation of free speech has taken on new meaning in the digital age.